How my children learned their ABCs: biguglymandoll

How my children learned their ABCs

A	Aaargh! Quiet back there!
B	Both of you, be quiet!
C	Christ, will you stop talking while I’m on the phone?
D	Damnit, I said be quiet!
E	Echoes are for canyons, which is where I’m going to throw you if you don’t stop talking!
F	For the love of God, shut up!
G	Goddammit, I thought I told you to be quiet!
H	How many times do I have to tell you to be quiet?
I	I’m sure I told you to be quiet!
J	Jesus! Shut! Up!
K	Kaconnannalaaaaaah! – stop it! Whichever one of you that is, just stop it!
L	La la la la la la! Not listening!
M	Mommy asked you to be quiet once. Mommy’s not going to ask again. Do I make myself clear?
N	Now would be a good time for you to exercise your quiet muscles.
O	Oh my God, if you don’t stop yelling I’m going to stop this car in the middle of this road and come back there and make you both very sorry!
P	Please please please, be quiet.
Q	Quiet!
R	Really, is it that hard to just sit quietly for One Damn Minute?
S	Shut up shut up shut up!!!
T	Talking. Don’t.
U	Unless you want to be grounded for the next 6 years, stay quiet.
V	Very. Quiet. Do you understand me?
W	Why can you not stay quiet?
X	Xtremely. As in quiet.
Y	You. Quiet. Now.
Z	Zoloft. Why do you ask?

How my children learned their ABCs