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January 25th, 2013

ManFAQ Friday: He’s in the Dark

Originally published at Big Ugly Man Doll. You can comment here or there.

Here we are, another Friday, and it’s answer time at the ManFAQ. Once again I don my manly mantle as Sage of the Sexes, helping demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler, as we add to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years. Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man.

What could go wrong?


Question: Why is it that almost all of his “plans” are spontaneous? I’d like to go to a movie or dinner, sure, but not tonight. Why does it seem like he doesn’t think more than 5 minutes ahead?

Answer: There are number of reasons for this, some of which were covered more specifically under Planning Parties. More generically, we tend to think about “the future” in two distinct categories:

  1. A period of time not exceeding the next 12 hours.
  2. “You know, a while from now,” which includes a range as soon as “tomorrow” and as late as “sometime in this life or the next.”

Needless to say, we don’t spend a lot of time on the second category. That leaves the next few hours as our primary focus. This is because we are thinking about Hey Hey, and we don’t think about Hey Hey in the abstract – we think about it as something we’d like to do RIGHT NOW. The net effect of this, of course, is that if we’re asking you about plans, the little guy doing the thinking isn’t doing any long term planning, he’s thinking about tonight.

Having established who’s doing this so-called “planning,” you can safely assume that any plans that involve you and the next few hours are, in his mind, plans that could conceivably lead to Hey Hey. (Take this as flattering or not, as you will.)

So why do we not plan for that second category of time, that amorphous future sometime between more than 12 hours from now and forever? Now that you know who’s doing the planning, can you really expect long-term thinking from a 6-inch-tall dude who spends 99% of his time hanging out in the dark with a couple of nuts? Really, that might be asking too much. The next 5 minutes are all he plans for, because really, that’s about all his headlights are illuminating, if you know what I mean.


Now you know. Please, feel free to comment! Also, forward any questions you’d like answered to BUMD – at – biguglymandoll.com! As always, your anonymity is guaranteed!

 

 



Yep, looks like another post from the Big, Ugly Man Doll!